Unconditional Writing

Writing used to be a daily ritual. Journaling, free form writing, reflective essays - whatever the name, it was a way that I started my day.

I viewed the pages as a companion, a trusted friend. A place I could always go to release any thoughts that were swirling around inside my head.

The pages did not judge. There was plenty of that coming from me. The pages were there to listen, no matter how dark or self-deprecating the expression. The pages accepted it all.

I miss my friend and the ritual we shared. So why did I abandon her?

Perhaps it was my judgement that the pages had become a place of negativity. That a pattern had emerged of framing my experiences, my reflections, in a short-sighted and non-serving way. That unless I was able to re-write the pages with positivity, they would become more detrimental than beneficial. I questioned the health of the relationship and walked away.

I’ve since learned that censoring myself was causing harm, not writing in a negative frame. While there are benefits to being optimistic and having a positive mindset, avoiding, rejecting, or shutting down emotions is detrimental towards your well being. It can alienate and disconnect you from yourself and from others. It is important to lean into what we’re authentically feeling in the moment, accepting all of our emotions, both positive and negative.

I missed the ritual of my writing, of having a safe place to release my thoughts, and the revelations uncovered over time when revisiting the pages.

So, with this I pledge to:

Re-establish the connection.

Write.

Do not censor.

Let whatever comes, come.

Release judgement.

Accept the words as the pages do.

If patterns appear, notice and accept them.

Work with them, or not.

But show up.

Authentically.

Every day.